Google's sense of humour.
Govind - on the youtube page there is an 'embed' link. Copy that and paste it into your post. Make sure that you have selected 'HTML On - Auto Linebreak Mode' from the drop down menu just below the text field. Hey presto.
Full Version: The Best of the Web
For those of you either not on Twitter or not following Simon Pegg I'm going to attempt to transcribe his tweets on the subject of Jet Bike Steve; a mini-series in the vein of Knight Rider which he dreamed up yesterday, tweeted and it took off:
I'm gonna write a film about jet bikes. I like them, they go fast on the sea. I play the main character, Jet Bike Steve. That's all so far.
JBS is not a cop. I've done that. He's a pirate but a good pirate. He goes round fucking up the yachts of fat cat health insurance execs
My jet bike is called the Barack-uda. Nick Frost plays my partner Thor, his jet bike is big and called Anne. This shit is writing itself!!!
There will be multiple installments, the first being Jet Bike Steve and the Bikini Thief. Comming Summer 2011. Prepare to get wet. Rated R.
The Barack-uda will talk like K.I.T.T. from Knightrider but with a Geordie accent. "Fook me Steve, we're gannin' reet fat noo!"
After the failure of JBS2, they hire Edgar Wright to helm 3. He recasts with pretty young Scott Pilgrim types. I feel like a right Tobey.
To be honest I don't give a fuck about JBS3 as long as it respects canon. If it doesn't I will be posting numerous bile-filled blogs.
"Unscrupulous health insurance execs in Indigo Bay? Let's show those fat cats the true meaning of socialism! To the jet bikes!!" Vrooom!
There will also be a weekly TV series with special celebrity guests. "Hop on Evangeline Lilly, I'll get you off this island!" vroooooom!
Tinky Winky has fractured his pelvis and his insurance has lapse?! Time to fick up a billionare's yacht to
raise funds for that all important hip op. Eh oh!!!
I can't believe I split that last tweet. What a nobhead. I'm going off twitter. For an hour.
Was that an hour? Thank you @phillipkennedy, it begins ... http://twitpic.com/1aisez (JBS & TBT Poster)
Under JBS's eyepatch is a highly polished steel ball bearing which he uses for GLINT ATTACK!!!
When JBS's jet bike breaks down, he blows a special whistle to summon a killer whatle called Andy Monteith whom he once rescued from a net.
A JBS bathtime playset available soon at toy store. Watch Jet Bike Steve batter Dick Splash while you bathe (requires 40 AA batteries).
Ha ha ha. This is getting out of control! RT @Lauriepink : Check this out! Jet Bike Steve Annual sneaky-peek! http://www.twitpic.com/1anyh8
Those are my abs but the face is that of an Italian model called Sergio. He's Napoli's 2nd best Simon Pegg look-a-like (€20 an hour).
It's worth pointing out, I'm the 3rd most popular Simon Pegg look-a-like in Napoli (€10 an hour).
That was a hard day's tweet. Going to watch Lost then Caprica to really nerd out the day, then bed. Night all. Vroooooooooooooooom.
There's a Facebook group and a mock-up of an action figure and everything.
(I've not got much to do right now...)
I'm gonna write a film about jet bikes. I like them, they go fast on the sea. I play the main character, Jet Bike Steve. That's all so far.
JBS is not a cop. I've done that. He's a pirate but a good pirate. He goes round fucking up the yachts of fat cat health insurance execs
My jet bike is called the Barack-uda. Nick Frost plays my partner Thor, his jet bike is big and called Anne. This shit is writing itself!!!
There will be multiple installments, the first being Jet Bike Steve and the Bikini Thief. Comming Summer 2011. Prepare to get wet. Rated R.
The Barack-uda will talk like K.I.T.T. from Knightrider but with a Geordie accent. "Fook me Steve, we're gannin' reet fat noo!"
After the failure of JBS2, they hire Edgar Wright to helm 3. He recasts with pretty young Scott Pilgrim types. I feel like a right Tobey.
To be honest I don't give a fuck about JBS3 as long as it respects canon. If it doesn't I will be posting numerous bile-filled blogs.
"Unscrupulous health insurance execs in Indigo Bay? Let's show those fat cats the true meaning of socialism! To the jet bikes!!" Vrooom!
There will also be a weekly TV series with special celebrity guests. "Hop on Evangeline Lilly, I'll get you off this island!" vroooooom!
Tinky Winky has fractured his pelvis and his insurance has lapse?! Time to fick up a billionare's yacht to
raise funds for that all important hip op. Eh oh!!!
I can't believe I split that last tweet. What a nobhead. I'm going off twitter. For an hour.
Was that an hour? Thank you @phillipkennedy, it begins ... http://twitpic.com/1aisez (JBS & TBT Poster)
Under JBS's eyepatch is a highly polished steel ball bearing which he uses for GLINT ATTACK!!!
When JBS's jet bike breaks down, he blows a special whistle to summon a killer whatle called Andy Monteith whom he once rescued from a net.
A JBS bathtime playset available soon at toy store. Watch Jet Bike Steve batter Dick Splash while you bathe (requires 40 AA batteries).
Ha ha ha. This is getting out of control! RT @Lauriepink : Check this out! Jet Bike Steve Annual sneaky-peek! http://www.twitpic.com/1anyh8
Those are my abs but the face is that of an Italian model called Sergio. He's Napoli's 2nd best Simon Pegg look-a-like (€20 an hour).
It's worth pointing out, I'm the 3rd most popular Simon Pegg look-a-like in Napoli (€10 an hour).
That was a hard day's tweet. Going to watch Lost then Caprica to really nerd out the day, then bed. Night all. Vroooooooooooooooom.
There's a Facebook group and a mock-up of an action figure and everything.
(I've not got much to do right now...)
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pretty cool
pretty cool
This article is genius. Scroll down for a badger reference.
David Mitchell on Godwin's Law
David Mitchell on Godwin's Law
QUOTE
Ben Folds does Chatroulette, at a gig. Utterly awesome
Have to confess I found this by accident before seeing Jonnyboy's post, it is immense. There is also a whole bunch of other 'improv' musical chatroulette stuff on there.
The original dude Ben Folds is imitating, Merton, is on there, and some random with a guitar version.
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Why we shouldn't be voting UKIP via the handy medium of an email from a party member on the subject of BBC cuts:
http://coffeeandroses.blogspot.com/2010/04...upport-bbc.html
http://coffeeandroses.blogspot.com/2010/04...upport-bbc.html
QUOTE
Why we shouldn't be voting UKIP via the handy medium of an email from a party member on the subject of BBC cuts:
http://coffeeandroses.blogspot.com/2010/04...upport-bbc.html
http://coffeeandroses.blogspot.com/2010/04...upport-bbc.html
That email is in serious need of a 'fisking'. I may well do the honours this evening if I get the chance.
Okay, here goes. The original UKIP email is in italics, my comments are in bold.
Thank you for your email. UKIP is receiving many thousands of questionnaires on various topics (from protection of our precious woodland, to the hunting debate, to tackling global poverty).Â
Interesting selection of topics here. No mention of the economic crisis. Presumably no one wants their view on that as the UKIP economic policy is limited to 'don't adopt the Euro' (how's that working out by the way?)
I'm sorry but we simply don't have time to forward each of these on to the 500+ UKIP candidates. We're a small party that relies on donations from members and well-wishers, and are not backed by big business or, indeed, the TUC.
This sentence is a classic example of simultaneous cake consumption and retention. In one breath the writer is boasting about the vast number (500+!) of UKIP candidates and at the same time saying 'we're really small with no money'. I also love the idea that UKIP have not heard of mailing lists and every time they need to communicate something to every candidate an individual email is sent to each one.
I am afraid that we are therefore unable to respond to your query in great detail. This does not imply either support or opposition to the particular matter you have raised.
"The rest of this email will make it abundantly clear what our position is though".
UKIP is a great fan of the BBC and recognises the huge contribution it has made to British cultural life over the decades.
"We hate the BBC."
We also support a publicly funded licence fee. (If you've ever watched American TV you'll know what we mean).
Yeah, American TV is so shit: The Wire, The West Wing, 24, Lost, Sopranos, all obviously mega-crap. Also, "lulzAmericans" is a cheap and lazy shot.
Nevertheless the Corporation has certainly allowed itself to dumb-down during the last few years, and seems to have completely surrendered to the liberal-left agenda.
No examples of this dumbing down? Imagine my surprise.
One example is "Global Warming" which the BBC completely embraced, ignoring the fact that thousands of reputable scientists had grave doubts about the "science" behind it, doubts that have now burst to the surface.
The writer surrenders all remaining credibility by putting the word science in quotation marks. Yes that's right, science doesn't really exist, the BBC made it up.
Another example is the BBC's insistence on quoting distances in metric when the British equivalent is 'miles'. For example, BBC journalist John Simpson, during the first Iraq War, doing a piece to camera: "The Iraqi positions are five kilometres down the valley." Suddenly there was a loud 'whooshing' noise and the air was thick with dust, stones and falling rocks. Off camera we heard Simpson say: "BLOODY HELL, that was 20 feet away!"
No, please save me from the future! Its bright light burns my eyes! Let me live in my imaginary past forever, a time when there was no crime, it always snowed at Christmas, and the sun shone all summer.
We might also add that when the BBC stops advertising its vacancies in leftie newspapers like the Guardian, critics might be more convinced of its neutrality.
The BBC will probably stop advertising vacancies in the Guardian when the Guardian stops being the best newspaper for advertising vacancies.
If a miracle happened and the BBC ever returned to the Reithian doctrine of "Inform, Explain, Entertain", I suspect that it might be astounded at the positive response from the public.
I'm pretty sure Reith wouldn't have used the word 'doctrine' to describe his vision. Also, name one BBC program that doesn't do one of the above and I will instantly find ten people who disagree with you. YOU ARE NOT THE AUTHORITY ON WHAT CONSTITUTES QUALITY PROGRAMMING. Not even close.
On the issue of Music-6 etc... UKIP would have no objection to the Corporation shedding some of its services (frankly we think it already tries to do far, far too much) and would applaud a policy of fewer channels but of greater quality.
It's a non-sequitur that fewer channels would mean greater quality.
Before we opened up the airwaves to multiple channels British television (ITV and BBC) produced programmes of quality that shone throughout the world.
The BBC still does. Doctor Who? Planet Earth? Life?Life On Mars? The Office? QI? Top Gear? I admit that ITV doesn't seem to bother any more, but cutting the number of BBC channels is hardly going to solve that problem.
Now we have literally dozens of channels of drivel, with advertising revenue so diluted that we are now at the stage where even Channel 4 is seeking public funds just in order to survive.
Actually there are just 10 BBC TV channels (that's less than one dozen in case you were wondering). If ITV and the other independent channels want to create new channels, produce drivel and dilute advertising revenue then that is their choice; there's nothing the BBC can do about it. In fact if you asked me what I think should happen to ITV I would suggest that Harry Hill's TV Burp should be purchased by the BBC and then the rest of it should be sacked off. Unlike your policy of giving less money to the BBC, this would actually help to solve the problem of crap on television.
We cannot comment on which particular services should be axed... that is an operational decision for those running the BBC.... but we would encourage the Corporation to pay greater attention to 'middle-England' which actually pays the bills, and devote less time to 'Yoof', most of whom are on the internet anyway.
Brilliant. If in doubt use terms that have no actual definition such as 'middle-England' and 'yoof'. I also love the recommendation to ignore the latter. Because obviously when the 'yoof' of Britain get older and wiser they will abandon that new-fangled internet and be clamouring for a CRT analogue telly to watch.
I could elaborate further but hopefully you have by now received the picture.
Actually the picture is yet to arrive. I think what you meant to say was 'you now hopefully get the picture'. Figures of speech lose their meaning if you change the words, dipshit.
Thank you for contacting us.
No, thank you.
Thank you for your email. UKIP is receiving many thousands of questionnaires on various topics (from protection of our precious woodland, to the hunting debate, to tackling global poverty).Â
Interesting selection of topics here. No mention of the economic crisis. Presumably no one wants their view on that as the UKIP economic policy is limited to 'don't adopt the Euro' (how's that working out by the way?)
I'm sorry but we simply don't have time to forward each of these on to the 500+ UKIP candidates. We're a small party that relies on donations from members and well-wishers, and are not backed by big business or, indeed, the TUC.
This sentence is a classic example of simultaneous cake consumption and retention. In one breath the writer is boasting about the vast number (500+!) of UKIP candidates and at the same time saying 'we're really small with no money'. I also love the idea that UKIP have not heard of mailing lists and every time they need to communicate something to every candidate an individual email is sent to each one.
I am afraid that we are therefore unable to respond to your query in great detail. This does not imply either support or opposition to the particular matter you have raised.
"The rest of this email will make it abundantly clear what our position is though".
UKIP is a great fan of the BBC and recognises the huge contribution it has made to British cultural life over the decades.
"We hate the BBC."
We also support a publicly funded licence fee. (If you've ever watched American TV you'll know what we mean).
Yeah, American TV is so shit: The Wire, The West Wing, 24, Lost, Sopranos, all obviously mega-crap. Also, "lulzAmericans" is a cheap and lazy shot.
Nevertheless the Corporation has certainly allowed itself to dumb-down during the last few years, and seems to have completely surrendered to the liberal-left agenda.
No examples of this dumbing down? Imagine my surprise.
One example is "Global Warming" which the BBC completely embraced, ignoring the fact that thousands of reputable scientists had grave doubts about the "science" behind it, doubts that have now burst to the surface.
The writer surrenders all remaining credibility by putting the word science in quotation marks. Yes that's right, science doesn't really exist, the BBC made it up.
Another example is the BBC's insistence on quoting distances in metric when the British equivalent is 'miles'. For example, BBC journalist John Simpson, during the first Iraq War, doing a piece to camera: "The Iraqi positions are five kilometres down the valley." Suddenly there was a loud 'whooshing' noise and the air was thick with dust, stones and falling rocks. Off camera we heard Simpson say: "BLOODY HELL, that was 20 feet away!"
No, please save me from the future! Its bright light burns my eyes! Let me live in my imaginary past forever, a time when there was no crime, it always snowed at Christmas, and the sun shone all summer.
We might also add that when the BBC stops advertising its vacancies in leftie newspapers like the Guardian, critics might be more convinced of its neutrality.
The BBC will probably stop advertising vacancies in the Guardian when the Guardian stops being the best newspaper for advertising vacancies.
If a miracle happened and the BBC ever returned to the Reithian doctrine of "Inform, Explain, Entertain", I suspect that it might be astounded at the positive response from the public.
I'm pretty sure Reith wouldn't have used the word 'doctrine' to describe his vision. Also, name one BBC program that doesn't do one of the above and I will instantly find ten people who disagree with you. YOU ARE NOT THE AUTHORITY ON WHAT CONSTITUTES QUALITY PROGRAMMING. Not even close.
On the issue of Music-6 etc... UKIP would have no objection to the Corporation shedding some of its services (frankly we think it already tries to do far, far too much) and would applaud a policy of fewer channels but of greater quality.
It's a non-sequitur that fewer channels would mean greater quality.
Before we opened up the airwaves to multiple channels British television (ITV and BBC) produced programmes of quality that shone throughout the world.
The BBC still does. Doctor Who? Planet Earth? Life?Life On Mars? The Office? QI? Top Gear? I admit that ITV doesn't seem to bother any more, but cutting the number of BBC channels is hardly going to solve that problem.
Now we have literally dozens of channels of drivel, with advertising revenue so diluted that we are now at the stage where even Channel 4 is seeking public funds just in order to survive.
Actually there are just 10 BBC TV channels (that's less than one dozen in case you were wondering). If ITV and the other independent channels want to create new channels, produce drivel and dilute advertising revenue then that is their choice; there's nothing the BBC can do about it. In fact if you asked me what I think should happen to ITV I would suggest that Harry Hill's TV Burp should be purchased by the BBC and then the rest of it should be sacked off. Unlike your policy of giving less money to the BBC, this would actually help to solve the problem of crap on television.
We cannot comment on which particular services should be axed... that is an operational decision for those running the BBC.... but we would encourage the Corporation to pay greater attention to 'middle-England' which actually pays the bills, and devote less time to 'Yoof', most of whom are on the internet anyway.
Brilliant. If in doubt use terms that have no actual definition such as 'middle-England' and 'yoof'. I also love the recommendation to ignore the latter. Because obviously when the 'yoof' of Britain get older and wiser they will abandon that new-fangled internet and be clamouring for a CRT analogue telly to watch.
I could elaborate further but hopefully you have by now received the picture.
Actually the picture is yet to arrive. I think what you meant to say was 'you now hopefully get the picture'. Figures of speech lose their meaning if you change the words, dipshit.
Thank you for contacting us.
No, thank you.
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Holy shit. Time to leave the country.
the worrying thing is that these people probably outnumber us normal folk by about 10-1
Rosie sent me this link, it has some amazing pictures!
http://www.boston.com/bigpicture/2010/04/m...allajokull.html
http://www.boston.com/bigpicture/2010/04/m...allajokull.html
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I'm upset now.
Or should this be in music...
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There was a classic discussion of this on Metafilter. This link is to the best explanation of the power of those four chords.
While we are on the subject of Metafilter, Newsweek have posted an article which describes how the Metafilter community have helped save two Russian girls from what was almost certainly a human trafficking racket. The story has also been picked up by MotherJones.com.
Metafilter is a great site. I have been a member for about 18 months now (lifetime membership costs just $5) and I was a lurker for some time before that. This kind of thing is what the internet is for.
Metafilter is a great site. I have been a member for about 18 months now (lifetime membership costs just $5) and I was a lurker for some time before that. This kind of thing is what the internet is for.
I've fallen a bit behind on my Charlie Brooker which has enabled a glut of reading (Link).
Anyway this little nugget on the subject of artificial life like what has been created and what we could do with the tech had me crying into my fist to avoid drawing attention to the fact I'm not doing any work:
Anyway this little nugget on the subject of artificial life like what has been created and what we could do with the tech had me crying into my fist to avoid drawing attention to the fact I'm not doing any work:
QUOTE
I'd create an animal that excretes meat, just to give vegetarians pause for thought. Ethically, what's the problem with eating a sausage, if it's been harmlessly pooed out by an animal? To sweeten the pill yet further, what if you put pleasure receptors in the animal's colon, so it actively enjoys the sausage-creation process; enjoys it to such a degree that it chases you down the street, yelping in orgasmic delight and producing a string of pan-ready chipolatas?
As a baker of cakes with an interest in science I found this article facinating. I notice also that there is one on the science of bread-making.
The Science of Cake Baking
The Science of Cake Baking
QUOTE(King @ 9-Jun-10, 10:42)
As a baker of cakes with an interest in science I found this article facinating. I notice also that there is one on the science of bread-making.
The Science of Cake Baking
The Science of Cake Baking
Winner.
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Hmm I need some handy, short-hand way of letting you know I laughed out loud at both of those...no: I can't think of a way.
<object width="640" height="385"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/X23lc8qvAkU&hl=en_GB&fs=1&rel=0"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/X23lc8qvAkU&hl=en_GB&fs=1&rel=0" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="640" height="385"></embed></object>
<object width="600" height="335"><param name="allowfullscreen" value="true" /><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always" /><param name="movie" value="http://vimeo.com/moogaloop.swf?clip_id=12816548&server=vimeo.com&show_title=1&show_byline=1&show_portrait=0&color=&fullscreen=1" /><embed src="http://vimeo.com/moogaloop.swf?clip_id=12816548&server=vimeo.com&show_title=1&show_byline=1&show_portrait=0&color=&fullscreen=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowfullscreen="true" allowscriptaccess="always" width="400" height="225"></embed></object><p><a href="http://vimeo.com/12816548">Lightning strikes three of the tallest buildings in Chicago at the same time!</a> from <a href="http://vimeo.com/cshimala">Craig Shimala</a> on <a href="http://vimeo.com">Vimeo</a>.</p>
I Write Like
I pasted the whole of Badgerfest IV in and it came out as J K Rowling. Then I tried Badgerfest VII and it came out as James Joyce. Not sure what that means other than confirming the all round genius of Jammyploy.
I pasted the whole of Badgerfest IV in and it came out as J K Rowling. Then I tried Badgerfest VII and it came out as James Joyce. Not sure what that means other than confirming the all round genius of Jammyploy.
Very interesting: I write like David Foster Wallace (Reviews of Australia, Green Zone, Zombieland, Push & Girl with Dragon Tattoo)
Other authors:
Douglas Adam (Star Trek)
HP Lovecraft (!) (Robin Hood)
Arthur C Clarke (The Cove)
James Joyce (Kick Ass - Obviously not making much sense in that review then)
and quite tellingly I feel
Stephanie Meyer (Twilight: New Moon)
I will now have to rent Infinite Jest to see how it compares to my slightly academically verbose posts. Have you read it Jennie?
Other authors:
Douglas Adam (Star Trek)
HP Lovecraft (!) (Robin Hood)
Arthur C Clarke (The Cove)
James Joyce (Kick Ass - Obviously not making much sense in that review then)
and quite tellingly I feel
Stephanie Meyer (Twilight: New Moon)
I will now have to rent Infinite Jest to see how it compares to my slightly academically verbose posts. Have you read it Jennie?
Oh dear, poor old Badger
I thought they didn't finish the lines because the stripes on his back tricked them into thinking they were already completed! But sadly this is not the case...
I thought they didn't finish the lines because the stripes on his back tricked them into thinking they were already completed! But sadly this is not the case...
QUOTE(King @ 15-Jul-10, 10:18)
Very interesting: I write like David Foster Wallace (Reviews of Australia, Green Zone, Zombieland, Push & Girl with Dragon Tattoo)
Other authors:
Douglas Adam (Star Trek)
HP Lovecraft (!) (Robin Hood)
Arthur C Clarke (The Cove)
James Joyce (Kick Ass - Obviously not making much sense in that review then)
and quite tellingly I feel
Stephanie Meyer (Twilight: New Moon)
I will now have to rent Infinite Jest to see how it compares to my slightly academically verbose posts. Have you read it Jennie?
Other authors:
Douglas Adam (Star Trek)
HP Lovecraft (!) (Robin Hood)
Arthur C Clarke (The Cove)
James Joyce (Kick Ass - Obviously not making much sense in that review then)
and quite tellingly I feel
Stephanie Meyer (Twilight: New Moon)
I will now have to rent Infinite Jest to see how it compares to my slightly academically verbose posts. Have you read it Jennie?
Yes, and it is good, but his collection of essays ''Considering the Lobster'' (something like that..) is superb.
I write like Lovecraft and Poe, apparently, although I only tried it out on two similar reviews. I think my love of alliteration might be showing itself there.
Cool; 'Consider the Lobster' is in my library...
I put my review of Sex And The City in and got Chuck Palahniuk.
Ever thought "I love Firefly, but those opening credits are really crap"?
Here they are with added awesome:
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Here they are with added awesome:
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Nice; but I feel kinda sorry for Sean Maher as the good Dr Tam is the only character without a freeze-frame intro...
Ever wondered what Halo would have been like on the Atari 2600? Wonder no more.
Cool
If you only ever watch one MW2 video, make it this one:<br/><br/>
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Using Kinect to record 3D video
<p>
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<p>
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Is it just me or is the Kinect a ridiculously powerful tool for the price? It seems almost impossibly good.
Especially when it has already been hacked for use with a PC (Linux) - Minority Report-style data manipulation ahoy?
Edit: Which probably went without saying after actually watching the clip (couldn't while at work).
Edit: Which probably went without saying after actually watching the clip (couldn't while at work).
For the Portal fans:
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This choir has done other fun stuff, including Rick-Rolling their audience:
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This choir has done other fun stuff, including Rick-Rolling their audience:
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<iframe title="YouTube video player" width="640" height="390" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/KT1pWo0WZJE" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>
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QUOTE(TheWoz @ 21-Apr-11, 12:06)
and on the football tip this is a nice bit of lightweight entertainment also!
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-latin-america-12634475
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